I've experienced loosing relatives before, as most have. I've been lucky that they have all been old and lived good lives. You could say that their time had come. It's sad, you feel the loss, the emptiness, but there is also a melancholic feeling of closure. They felt the burden of their aging bodies, the ailments that slowly accumulated over time, their bones hurt, their ability to see, to remember getting worse, slowly loosing their ability to stay connected with the world around them. But they all had family around them, the joys of seeing their children and in some cases, grandchildren. And when their time arrived, it was in some sense welcome, not tragic.
But it is very different when lives are cut short. When lives are suddenly ended, long before their time. I saw a dear friends family getting scared and damaged when their son/brother was ripped from their midst. He collapsed in the middle of a PE lesson in highschool, weeks before his graduation. One moment he was playing soccer, the next, he was laying on the field, in the grass, his heart not beating anymore. Dead. I got the call as I sat 200 km away, waiting for the bus. My father was sobbing, he had been visiting the dad in the family when he had gotten the call and hurried out the door. Emil was gone and the family hurt and in agony, along with all their friends that knew Emil.
I felt loss again today. My dear friend, my companion that I talked to every day, that I played games with most evenings, the one that kept my company in my loneliness, is gone. I only knew her online, but we had kept each other company for 8 years, supporting each other when life was hard and we hurt. She disappeared 17 days ago, leaving me worried, beside myself, feeling the loneliness creeping in. I was unable to contact any of her family to find out what happened. Until today when I saw her online again and for a brief moment felt happiness. But it was her father, informing me that she had passed away yesterday, surrounded by her family. And now I just feel an emptiness inside me, my heart hurts. I don't know how I will be able to handle being without her beside me.
Melanie, you will be dearly missed and lovingly remembered. Thank you for all you have given me. You will live on in my memories.